I believe the world would be a better place if we all took some time to get to know ourselves. Become aware of our own ticks and triggers, recognize them, accept them, and integrate them. Then we probably wouldn’t be so thrown off balance when we meet others whose ticks and triggers are different. While there are multiple theories and models explaining individual differences, I have found Jungian typology to be the most comprehensive and inclusive.

I believe the world would be a kinder place if we recognized that all our feelings are valid and useful, even the “bad” ones. Not drown in shame over past mistakes, but learn from them, have empathy for our younger selves, and move on. This often involves zooming out and looking at why we judge ourselves so harshly, including structural stigma and interpersonal biases rooted in our cultural contexts.

I believe traditional heteronormative and mononormative relationship structures perpetuate a romantic ideal that neither reflects nor serves those living in the complexities of the 21st Century. Dating, mating, and relating are processes informed by our individual differences, and just like us, they have to be allowed to change over time. I work with my clients to facilitate those conversations.